In 2014, Christina Perri released her song “Human.”
I was a fan of it then and I’m a fan of it now. It’s an excellent reminder of just how mortal we are and how we can strive and strive being who others want us to be, but we each have breaking points because, after all, we’re “only human.”
I’ve never felt my humanness more than in the last two weeks.
I’m exhausted. Mentally, physically, and emotionally. I have let people down and made some not so great leadership decisions, I’ve talked too much and then didn’t say enough, I haven’t been consistent in the Word and spent too much time on my phone, I’ve cried more than I have in the last two years combined and been sick (equaling an insane amount of trashed Kleenexes), I’ve had pity parties and felt so lonely, and through it all I’ve relearned something I tend to try to forget.
I am human. (So incredibly human.) And, as Christina Perri says, “I crash and I break down.”
But through this rediscovery of my many limitations, I’ve been swept up to worship as this dawning has been made so real, so personal:
We cannot exhaust God.
We can’t exhaust His mercy, love, or compassion, and we can’t exhaust Him.
He never wakes up one day and says, “Eh, I’m not feeling it today. I don’t have the energy to deal with you. Sorry, I’m going to take a nap.” We can’t exhaust Him! He is inexhaustible.
As I sit here gulping coffee and trying to not be tired, this is amazing to me. God is so crazy beautiful, isn’t He?
And you and me, well, we are beautifully limited. It’s what reminds us we need a Savior, that we’re not all there is to this life. It’s what keeps us clinging to the cross and realizing that we don’t have it all together, nor are we supposed to (if we did, why would Jesus have to come?).
Our physical, mental and emotional human limitations are beautiful because they paint a picture of two things:
- Jesus became human. The inexhaustible One became exhausted (in every way). He was tired, hungry, emotionally drained and wounded (figuratively and literally).Why did He become human and voluntarily experience the limitations we (I) so desperately want to remove? To be the propitiation for our sins. He became human so we could become whole. His human death brings supernatural life. (And yes I know He died as both God and man, but please overlook my imprecise theological words.)
- God is not like me. We can’t wear Him out. He doesn’t crash and break down. He doesn’t say, “Oh my word, I can’t believe this girl needs MORE GRACE TODAY. I GAVE HER GRACE YESTERDAY, WHAT IN THE WORLD, CAN’T SHE GET HER ACT TOGETHER?!” He patiently, lavishly, extravagantly, beautifully dispenses everything we need over and over and over and over. His energy never runs out and neither does His love for you.
I’m learning to be grateful for the sermon our weaknesses and limitations preach. May my ears be tuned to hear it.